Christopher Persley woke up around 7 a.m. He got breakfast and lunch for his five-year-old daughter, Camilla, before she left for school. For the rest of the afternoon, Persley did dishes, finished laundry, cleaned the house, and squeezed in some reading and writing. Once his daughter got back from school they played, ate a home cooked meal, and started getting ready for bed.

It was a typical day for Persley, a stay-at-home father.

“I have a truly wonderful relationship with my daughter,” said Persley, 42, of the Upper West Side. “There is nothing more fulfilling than that. I get to be the one who picks her up from school, who helps her maturation, who supports her identity development.”

Since 1989, the number of fathers who stay at home with their children has nearly doubled, reaching its highest point at 2.2 million in 2010. The number of stay-at-home fathers who say the main reason for staying home is caring for their family has also grown significantly since 1989, increasing from 5 to 21 percent.

Dr. Caryn Medved sits in her office at Baruch College and explains her recent studies on stay-at-home fathers. Photo by Alex Zuccaro

Dr. Caryn Medved, Associate Professor of Communication Studies at Baruch College, did an in-depth study on stay-at-home fathers. Her inspiration for this study actually came up when her own brother became an at-home father.

Medved believed that one of the most important takeaways from her project was the establishment of parenting roles with at-home dads and breadwinning mothers was not just a result of economic issues.

“You read a lot in newspapers and things like that, that often times this arrangement is brought about because of economics,” she said. “But I was surprised at the number of couples who were there for all sorts of other reasons.”

Many couples also felt more comfortable with a parent staying at home with their children instead of using daycare facilities or hiring a nanny.

For the Persley family, Christopher and his wife, Jenelle, knew that they wanted someone within the family watching their daughter.

“I think our biggest fear was how much of an influence would someone else be on our child,” said Persley. “Would they stifle who she is and lead her to become someone who she’s not?”

Because his wife had stricter hours at the lab she worked at, it made more sense for Persley, who worked at an independent school, to transition into being the at-home parent. He had worked with kids for a long time at his school and was excited about filling that role

“Jenelle loved the idea of it being me,” he said. “She always felt that I was the parent better suited for that sort of extended time with our child.”

Once the couple officially made this decision, Persley told his supervisor that he was going to be leaving work to be a full-time dad. He was surprised to see that some of his co-workers weren’t as supportive of his decision as he thought they would be.

“There were some other people in the community that really didn’t get it, who thought that I was being fired saying, ‘There’s no way this guy is walking away from this job to be home with his kid,’” he said.

Persley also had trouble finding other stay-at-home fathers he could connect with.

Eventually, he found NYC Dads Group, a community of fathers who get together for playdates, classes and other social events

Medved discovered through interviewing her participants that these societal perceptions of the traditional male role does affect how stay-at-home fathers define themselves. Some of them own their title, but others get more insecure in certain social situations, like at a wife’s work party or an outing at the park.

“They might be at a party and someone asks, ‘So what do you do?’ And there certainly were plenty of men that I talked to that said, ‘Oh it depends on the day. Sometimes I’m a photographer,’ which is maybe a part time job or a hobby they do,” she said. “And sometimes they own it. But those kinds of situations are the most challenging for them.”

For breadwinning mothers, similar social situations can be challenging for them as well.

Cherry Vasquez, is a working mother of two. She currently lives with her husband, Jim, in Dallas, Texas.

When Vasquez first became pregnant at 21, she was making more money as a federal government worker than her husband, and that’s when they decided that he should be the at-home parent. Both Vasquez and her husband immigrated to the United States from the Philippines at a young age, and because of cultural differences, not all of the couple’s friends and family understand their household dynamic. Vasquez said that in traditional Philippine culture, the father is supposed to work and the mother is supposed to stay at home with the family.

Cherry Vasquez with her husband and two children. As the working mother of the family, Vasquez has had to overcome scrutiny from friends and her parents who believe in a more traditional household environment.

That is why Vasquez’s mother envisioned a different life for her daughter.

“My dad always stayed home too,” said Vasquez. “My dad took care of me, so that’s not something new to me. But my mom would have preferred for that not to be my family situation as well, because she was the one working. I’m sure she was hoping that I would change things.”

But she knew that having her husband stay at home was the best decision for their children.

“They actually really appreciate having one of us stay home,” said Vasquez. “So like when dad asks, ‘Oh can I go back to work now? You guys are older.’ They say no.”

And Vasquez doesn’t mind coming home to a cooked meal and a clean house either, since it gives her more time to spend with her family.

“He takes care of cooking and takes the kids wherever they need to be and that way, when I’m off of work, I don’t have to worry about all of that,” she said. “I can just spend time with the kids once I get home.”

Although stay-at-home fathering is still viewed as ‘non-traditional,’ the increase of this family dynamic over the past decade indicates that it is becoming more socially accepted in society. Even big companies like Lego, have introduced a stay-at-home dad figure as part of the brand’s new Lego City line. And many stay-at-home fathers, like Persley just want people to realize that dads are parents too.

“Most of us want to be just as involved as moms in the raising of our children,” he said. “And a man can be an at-home parent just as easily as a woman.”

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It all started with a text.

Matthew Miller, an Iraq War veteran, woke up to a barrage of sentiments from friends and fellow soldiers saying “Happy Veterans Day Brother” or “We got’em bros.” But the numerous texts blurred together, as the depressive memories that Miller was so familiar with began to take over.

He remembered the smell of death coming from the seven soldiers he fought to save, but couldn’t bring back home. He saw the face of one of the soldiers, James, and remembered his bleeding wound as he fought for his life. Then, he remembered he face of James’ crying commander after realizing that James was gone. He remembered all of them, with their swollen faces and bleeding bodies, gone.

It’s going to be another bad day, he thought to himself.

Every day an estimated 22 veterans lose their lives to suicide a day, and every day Miller fights to not be one of them.

“I had a suicide attempt years ago,” said Miller. “And I never said anything to anybody.”

There were times when Miller, who served with the Army National Guard, thought it would be easier to stick the barrel of a gun down his mouth and pull the trigger. He hated feeling like an emotional burden on his family, and always relying on others for support.

Despite the severe emotional and mental trauma Miller faces, he actually considers himself one of the lucky few. He dedicates his survival to the biggest positive in his life, his wife Ronda, who recognized Miller needed help.

“I have a great wife who was behind me and didn’t give up on me,” said Miller. “My wife was actually the one that saw [the depression], and was like you’re getting help whether you want it or not.”

Unfortunately, Miller of Maryland, has seen what happens to veterans when they don’t have anyone to come home to and get them through their issues.

“A lot of these guys would come home and you’re not really wired the same anymore and you start having a lot of problems,” said Miller. “You get into self-medicating and fits of depression and sometimes fits of rage.”

Many veterans have resorted to relying on each other to be their biggest support system. In fact, fellow Iraq War veteran, Danny Farrar, of Maryland, strives to be just that for soldiers returning from combat. That is why he started the non-profit organization, Platoon 22, which was designed to bring awareness to veterans suicide.

“If more people knew about it, then it would matter more,” said Farrar.

But Farrar isn’t only an advocate for veterans who struggle with PTSD and suicide. He is also a suicide survivor.

The Army veteran came from a troubled background, he was adopted at a young age, molested by a family member. After getting out of high school, he went straight into the military and remained there for nine years. But there was nothing for Farrar when he returned.

He ended up homeless, his first marriage fell apart, and shortly after that, found himself seriously considering taking his own life.

Farrar’s suicidal thoughts eventually subsided after getting counseling, but he knows that things could have turned out much differently. That is why he is so dedicated to informing veterans and other people in the community about suicide prevention. He wants to let people know that there are resources available that can help.

“You can have mental issues and come back from it,” said Farrar. “You never cure it, but you can go on to live a successful, productive life.”

Farrar said that out of the estimated 22 veterans that commit suicide each day, only five are enrolled in the VA health care system and are actively seeking help. He explained that the system the government has in place for veterans can often be complicated, leading many veterans to feel like it’s not worth pursuing help.

“A lot of veterans don’t feel like dealing with all that,” said Farrar. “So you drink, suck it up, get up, and move on.”

The Veterans Administration or VA isn’t always easy to navigate.

“A lot of times, especially with the VA, they have you just leave a message and the phone rings and rings and you never get a call back,” said Tommy Marquez, Veterans Caseworker for Congressman Duncan Hunter.

Marquez’s primary role in the Congressman’s office is to facilitate communication between constituents and federal agencies, such as the VA. Because mental health has become such a big part of this process, a lot of Marquez’s cases are with terans trying to get their PTSD benefits. In fact, it is the second highest claim received.

One of Marquez’s most memorable cases was with a U.S. Navy Seal who had his PTSD benefits denied. During the Seal’s evaluation he was asked if he had nightmares, and he said that he didn’t, but he had a ecurring dream where he is with his platoon in Iraq standing on a bridge that gets blown up. They all fall down and eventually get crushed by all the rubble and debris. Marquez explained that because the Navy Seal sarcastically told his counselor that he didn’t have nightmares when he clearly did, the VA denied his benefits.

It is stories like this that prevent a lot of veterans from turning to the VA for help. In fact, after hearing about a fellow veteran whose disability ratings sporadically decreased from 80 percent to 30 percent, Miller also lives with the fear that the VA will take his benefits away.

“I’m 100 percent disabled for Post-Traumatic Stress and after three years it’s supposed to go permanent and total. And it’s been over three years, but I’m terrified to go to the VA and say can I make this permanent and total because I’m afraid that they’ll do what they did to one of my teammates,” said Miller.

In February, President Obama signed the Clay Hunt Act aimed at reducing veteran suicide and improving their access to health care. The act was named after a former Marine who committed suicide in 2011.

The act requires annual third party evaluations of VA’s mental health care and suicide prevention programs. There will be a centralized website with resources and information about the range of mental health services available as well as a three-year pilot program using peer support to assist veterans transitioning from active duty. It encourages collaborative suicide prevention efforts between the VA and non-profit mental health organizations.

The president’s proposed 2016 budget also includes more than $7 billion for the VA to continue its focus on expanding mental health services for vets.

Michael Abramovich an Iraq War veteran, looks out into the harbor by the Intrepid Museum, as he recounts the obstacles he’s faces as a veteran. Photo by Alexandra Zuccaro

While receiving benefits and treatment for veterans returning from combat remains a big issue, it is even more difficult for veterans who never had combat experience. PTSD doesn’t discriminate based on a soldier’s experience abroad, and even those who haven’t served in combat can be affected. This was the case for Iraq War veteran, Michael Abramovich, of Staten Island, who served as a support soldier in the U.S. Army for the National Guard and Army Reserves.

When Abramovich first returned to the states after his service, he felt like he had to suppress his emotional trauma because of the culture of military training which views showing emotion as a negative thing.

“I didn’t have the real combat experience of infantry men and yet I had a traumatic experience. And I was afraid to talk to someone about it because I felt it was a sign of weakness and that I was being a cry baby,” said Abramovich.

Abramovich has since realized that PTSD is not something to be ashamed of and has even found strength rallying behind the issue.

“I did find a great veterans community and I did get involved,” said Abramovich. “Nothing will get accomplished unless veterans stand up and fight for what we do deserve for our service.”

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Even before the first New York Marathon runner hit the track this morning, NYPD officers could be seen in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn lining the streets with caution tape and blocking off roads with their squad cars. As the crowds started to emerge around 9:30 a.m., additional officers were walking up and down the streets, trying to clear walkways and control the abundant excitement.

But the uniformed officials weren’t the only NYPD attendees at the marathon this morning. Many members of the NYPD were seen running in the race, with their supportive coworkers flocking to the sidelines to cheer them on.

Jackie McMahon, an NYPD employee, was one of these cheerleaders. She was more than happy to get up early to cheer on her comrades.

“I always enjoy watching the marathon,” said McMahon. “I have a sergeant who I work with who is running. I don’t know if I will see her in this huge crowd, but I told her I would be here.”

Once the race was in full swing, McMahon waved and smiled at all the runners who were sporting NYPD shirts “Way to go NYPD!” she shouted.

The crowd chants, “Go NYPD” as officers, sporting their official marathon shirts, run through Bay Ridge. Photo by Alexandra Zuccaro

Along with her NYPD coworkers, McMahon was also very excited to see the handicapped runners, who started trickling in during the early hours of the race. The crowds was sparse , but McMahon makes a special effort each year to see the handicapped participants roll by in their wheelchairs.

“My sister is handicapped, so I just feel very supportive towards the handicapped runners,”she said.

Although McMahon has watched past marathons all around the city, she now loves watching in her Bay Ridge neighborhood. The energy here is different she said.

“It’s not as big of a crowd as you would get in Manhattan, but the energy is very high because they are just starting out,” she said.

In Bay Ridge, the buzz was definitely alive, with runners stopping along the sides to take selfies with the viewers or high-fiving the kids sticking their hands out as they were held over the railing by their parents.

Bay Ridge spectators also made an effort to keep the runners pumped. While marathon runners trudged up the hill on 94^th St, a group of locals, including a few NYPD officers, chanted “Welcome to Brooklyn!” Some of the runners waved to the officers and cheerers in response, and used that hype to make it around the upcoming turn onto 4^th Avenue.

“There’s a big police presence and it’s exciting,” said McMahon. “It’s what makes it a nice event.”

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Hundreds of New Yorkers gathered around the 9/11 Memorial today, hoping to get a glimpse of Pope Francis entering the site for an interfaith service with the families of the victims of the September 11 attack. But among the swarm of Pope Francis fans, were several groups of protesters and religious enthusiasts, attempting to persuade the onlookers to “go home and repent.”

The protesters passed around flyers featuring lists of biblical quotes and wore t-shirts that read “You Repent” and “Fear God” printed on them. They shouted into their megaphones at the people passing by, imploring visitors to divert their attention from the pope’s activities and focus on the “truths” of God.

“Jesus Christ died for sinners, not Mary, not Pope Francis, not Pope Benedict, not any priest,” said protestor Don Karns. “A lot of Roman Catholics come out here today. To even be a mile near him they come here and stand in line. But it gives us an opportunity to share the truth.”

One of the big concerns among the protesters was that the pope’s visit would deflect from the word of God that is taught in the Bible. They believed that all of the excitement around the weekend’s events was just a big distraction.

The 9/11 Memorial was not the only place where religious protesters were making noise. Groups like the Westboro Baptists were also seen waving their signs in other areas around the city where people were gathering to see the pope.

“God hates fags,” shouted Westboro Baptist leader, Ben Phelps, outside of Madison Square Garden in response to the Pope’s more accepting comments about homosexuality.

But it did not deter thousands of New Yorkers, visitors and tourists, from watching and waiting for the Pope. They waved their yellow and white papal flags and showed off their Pope Francis merchandise, which included t-shirts and buttons with the Pope’s face plastered across the front as well as clever phrases that read “I Love Pope Francis” and “The Pope Gives Me Hope.” Few payed any attention to the shouting protesters.

“These religious people just want a show,” said native New Yorker, Frank Petrino. “They want to make other people realize what they should and shouldn’t be doing.”

Like several other visitors, Petrino was on his lunch break when he decided to head over to the memorial. Being an Italian Roman Catholic, the idea of potentially seeing Pope Francis was an opportunity he did not want to miss, and a few protesters weren’t going to stop him.

“This pope is a very ‘people-person’ and I think he’s making a difference in a lot of people’s lives. I would love to see him,” said Petrino.

Most New Yorkers ignoring the religious rants, but it didn’t deter the protestors from standing on the curbsides for hours and preaching their beliefs, hoping that there might be a few people in the crowds willing to listen to their message.

“We prayed before we came here that somehow God would give them ears to hear and change their heart today,” said Karns.

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Jenna Torres was only 17 when she was placed in the Human Trafficking Intervention Courts system. She was a single mother, a student, and also engaged in sex work to try to make ends meet for her family. But once the young Torres was put through the courts, it was almost too much for her to handle.

“The whole process almost ended my academic career,” she said. “I had to choose between going to court-mandated sessions, school, or being with my children. The day I was supposed to pick up my college schedule, I was charged with prostitution.”

Torres appeared in City Hall yesterday to testify at a hearing on the Effectiveness of Human Trafficking Intervention Courts to the Committee on Courts and Legal Services as well as the Committee on Women’s Issues. As a Community Organizer for the Red Umbrella Project, Torres wanted to be part of the change for other young girls that are forced to go through this system.

Human trafficking is a big problem in New York, and still largely affects areas in the Queens and the Bronx. Because of this, the city utilizes a special court system known as the Human Trafficking Intervention Courts, to help evaluate cases specifically relating to sex work and prostitution. The courts offer services such as counseling and immigration aid that are often mandated for the prosecuted victims. But many victims of these crimes complain that the systems lack in providing resources that are actually effective, such as housing and jobs.

“How can we include sex workers’ voices when assessing sex workers’ needs?” asked Councilman Carlos Menchaca during the hearing.

Members of the Red Umbrella Project joined by its sister organization, Persist Health Project, also attended the hearing. Both organizations strive to give support and resources to those involved in the sex trade. Many of their members are actually victims of human trafficking, and hoped that the meeting would urge officials to involve them in this conversation.

“Why are people in the sex trades not given meaningful opportunities to speak about their lives?” said Audacia Ray, Executive Director at the Red Umbrella Project. “What is controversial about the notion that sex workers should be centered and involved in determining the kinds of services received and the way funding is allocated?”

Another problem highlighted was the booking process that sex workers have to go through when they are bring arrested. The panel explained that being put in handcuffs, shoved in the back of a police car, and taken to the station was an incredibly humiliating system for many victims, especially for those in the transgender community who were often put in cells with other men who teased and taunted them.

“I want to echo that arrest does not equal rescue for these people. Arrest equals trauma,” said Menchaca.

With so many issues surrounding the courts and the criminal justice system, sex work victims just want to be part of the solution that helps them get the resources they need.

“People in sex trades are the experts and we must be at the table to shape services,” said Ray.

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Outside of the 9/11 memorial this morning, Mike Holy and Miriam Holy sat quietly. Every single year since the attack that took 2,753 lives, this Maryland couple has traveled to New York City to remember and mourn. Today marked their 14th trip to ground zero.

Although the Holys did not know any of the victims, they both grew up in the area and felt deeply connected to the tragedy.

“I remember that day so vividly. I was listening to the radio when I heard that a plane crashed into the first tower. Everyone thought it was an accident, but when the second plane came in at 9:05 a.m., I knew that we were at war again,” Mike Holy said.

On top of being raised in the city, Mike Holy had the added connection of being able to sympathize as a Vietnam War Veteran. He was all too familiar with the concept of losing loved ones in the line of duty, similar to what many first responders had experienced.

“One motive for me coming here is what came after 9/11,” he said. “A problem with war is that we don’t do a very good job with bringing people back.”

The Vietnam War Veteran also recalled a meeting he had with a fireman who was there during the evacuation of the Twin Towers. After they talked and exchanged stories, the fireman gave Mike Holy a pin he had received for his service, which featured a waving American flag in the background and the head of a stoic, bald eagle in the forefront.

Pin given to Mike Holy by 9/11 Fireman. Photo by Alexandra Zuccaro

“I told him I can’t take this, this is yours. And then he just told me, now it’s yours,” he said as he proudly showed off the patriotic pin he was wearing on his baseball cap.

Miriam Holy was also drawn to the memorial today. In Maryland, she works as a nurse and remembered how the attack on the Pentagon made everyone so anxious. She saw how intensely everyone was affected, and how vulnerable people became.

The bond between first responders and war veterans was unmistakable. Even around the memorial grounds, men and women in uniforms of all different colors, shapes, and sizes proceeded to the entrance together.

Despite the large crowds wanting to participate in the memorial service, access was limited to family members.

But that won’t stop the Holys from returning next year.

“Growing up, coming into the city was always a treat,” said Miriam Holy. “But today’s not a treat, it’s an obligation.”

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